Eat Every Bean and Pea on Your Plate

Words and music by John Boydston

It’s a kids world
So big and blue
It’s a great place
for me and you

It’s a kids world
And it’s a kids sky
Big white clouds
And the birds that fly

It’s a great world
and I’m a gonna shout it
It’s a cool place
No two ways about it

It’s a kids World
And I had a dream
That everybody learned to
Play the tamborine

Well it’s a kids world
Yeah Yeah Yeah
Everybody else just gets to dance in it
It’s a kids world
Oh my my

It’s a kids dog
And it’s a kids cat
It’s a kids ball
And it’s a kids bat

It’s a kids hat
And it’s a kids coat
It’s a kids glove
And it’s a kid goat

It’s a kids moon
in the nighttime sky
The stars light up
Sometimes they fly

It’s a kids world
And I think it’s best
Write this down
Cause this could be on the test

Well it’s a kids world
Yeah Yeah yeah
Cause everybody needs to have some fun
It’s a kids world
Oh my my
Everybody dance in 4-3-2-1!

It’s a kids world
And I wouldn’t kid you
About a kids world
So big and blue

It’s a kids world
And its full of wonder
Lightning and rain
And sometimes thunder

It’s a kids month
And it’s a kids year
It’s a kids day
Getcher self in gear

It’s a kids world
Cause sure enough
Why else would everybody
try and sell me stuff?

Well it’s a kids world
Yeah Yeah Yeah
Everybody else just gets to dance in it
It’s a kids world
Oh my my
It’s a kids world because it is — Everybody sing

Well it’s a kids World
Yeah Yeah Yeah
Everybody else gets to hang out in it
Oh my my
Everybody listen to the children sing now, about
The Kids World!

Kids world
Kids world
Kids world
Kids world

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by John Boydston

You know driving a car, from what I hear
It’s kinda fun once you learn how to steer
And riding a bike, it’ll get you there
But sometimes that wind will mess up your hair
But nothing can beat, walking on your own two feet
So go get your socks, and go get your shoes
Because for those about to walk
We Salute You!

You can take it from us — we’re no small fries
We been walking since we were just about your size
Once you take that step you’ll never look back
Next thing you know you’ll be hitting the track, jack!
(Hey my name’s not Jack)
But nothing can beat your own two feet
So go get your socks, and go get your shoes
Because for those about to walk
We Salute You!

First you take one step, and then you take another
Don’t worry if you fall
Word to your mother
Once you get the hang, its pretty fun
But don’t forget you gotta walk before you run

(guitar workout frenzy, not really)
So nothing can beat walking on your own two feet
So go get your socks, and go get your shoes
Because for those about to walk
We Salute You!
For those about to Walk – we salute you!

©2005 (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by John Boydston

If you wanna grow up
To be big and strong
You gotta eat the right foods
And you’ll never go wrong
I’m hoping and a wishing
That everybody will listen
And learn about nutrition in this song

You gotta eat your potatoes
And your lettuce and tomatoes
And broccoli and spinach
Will make you strong to the finish
Ain’t no time to wait
Cause you’re gonna feel great
If you eat every bean and pea on your plate

Eats lots of fruit
Like apples and bananas
Drink lots of milk and juice from Tropicana
You gotta eat the right foods
And you’re gonna feel great
So eat every bean and pea on your plate

If you eat all your veggies, you’ll never get a wedgie
You’ll look good feel fine, even if your name is Reggie
Eat the right foods, and you’re gonna feel great
You gotta eat every bean and pea
Eat every bean and pea
Eat every bean and pea, on your plate

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

b

There’s no crying in the dugout
That’s what my coach said
But last time I looked up at my coach
His eyes were getting pretty red
It’s no fun, when it’s 20 to none
and the game has just begun
But there’s no crying in the dugout uh-uh-uh

There’s no crying in the dugout
That’s what I heard my coach say
But last time we saw him he had a pinwheel hat
And was rolling skating away
After 12 strike outs
In 12 at bats
Maybe it just ain’t our day
So there’s lots of crying in the dugout, at least today

They got a pitcher that we can’t hit
And we can’t seem to get the ball in our mitts
We’re swinging at balls, and looking at strikes
Our heads aren’t in the zone
Maybe we should just go home

I wish we could blame the umpire
But he’s calling ’em like he sees ’em
Now everybody’s watching the clock
And waiting for the end of baseball
and the start of soccer season

There’s no crying in the dugout
That’s what everybody’s sayin’
But our parents are looking at the scoreboard
And they’re wishin’ and a’prayin’
Maybe a monsoon or a hurricane
might be enough to stop our pain
But there’s no crying in the dugout
But there’s no crying in the dugout
But there’s no crying in the dugout

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by John Boydston

Sometimes I think that if I had my druther
I’d trade in my brother, for another
He’s the world’s biggest pest, like no other
But don’t try telling that to my mother

He’s a pest for all seasons, that’s my brother
Fall Winter Spring especially Summer
When I’m trying to have fun, he’s a bummer
When it comes to little brothers, there’s no one dumber

He’ll bother you more than a 25-pound mosquito
He’ll scare you more than a Broccoli Burrito

Come on and let me in
Irritation Man
Now he’s locked all the doors
Now I’m trapped in the can
Come on and let me out
Irritation Man
Nobody Understands

Maybe you got a little brother
or maybe a sister
That gets under your skin
like an really painful blister

Let’s have a big hand for the Irritation Man
Everybody knows he’s doing everything he can
He’s driving me crazy, but that’s my little brother
I guess I wouldn’t really trade him for another
At least without first asking my mother

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by The Ramones (Jeffrey Hyman, John Cummings, Douglas Colvin, Thomas Erdelyi)

Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go

They’re forming in straight line
They’re going through a tight wind
The kids are using their minds
Kids Beat Bop

Well hey ho, let’s go
Dancing in the back row
What they want, I don’t know
But they’re all revved up and ready to go

They’re forming in straight line
They’re going through a tight wind
The kids are using their minds
Kids Beat Bop

They’re bouncing in the back seat
They’re bouncing to the back beat
Can’t stop moving their feet
Kids Beat Bop

Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go

They’re bouncing in the back seat
they’re bouncing to the back beat
Can’t stop moving their feet
Kids Beat Bop

Well hey ho, let’s go
Dancing in the back row
What they want, I don’t know
But they’re all revved up and ready to go

Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go
Hey Ho, Let’s Go

©1976, WB Music Corp, OBO Blue Disque Music Co, Inc, OBO Taco Tunes

Words and music by John Boydston

Well everybody’s driving in their cars
While they’re talking on their phones
I don’t know why they
Can’t they wait til’ they get home?
I don’t mean to be curt
But somebody’s gonna get hurt
They’re sharing their gift of gab
But maybe they could share a cab

Nobody’s using their blinkers
They’re driving way off course
Driving like a bunch of stinkers
Maybe they should ride a horse
Talking 75 but only driving 10
I’ve seen a lot worse driving
but I don’t know when

Time to hang up and drive
Or you might just have a crash-up
Time to hang up and drive
Or you might cause a smash-up

We should set a good example
When we’re driving in our car
You know you’ll never see me
Behind the wheel playing my guitar

If you’re gonna talk and drive I wanna wish you luck
Please let me know if you ever start driving a truck

Time to hang up and drive
Or you might just have a crash-up
Time to hang up and drive
Or you might cause a smash-up

Everybody’s talking and driving
Maybe they should ride a bus
Cause take a look around
Its way too dangerous (for us)
You can play a game ’Count The Talking Heads’
Get a point for everyone who should be walking instead

Tell ’em to hang up and drive
So they don’t have a crash-up
Tell ’em to hang up and drive
So they don’t have a smash-up
No more talking and jiving
No more talking and driving

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes
(Thanks for Stacy LaVictoire for her phone performance here. She would never talk and drive in real life)

Written by Don Black, Mark London
(This is an instrumental version, but here are the lyrics if you want to sing along with this great tune from the ’60s, originally sung by Lulu)

Those schoolgirl days of telling tales
and biting nails are gone
But in my mind I know they will still
live on and on

But how do you thank someone
who has taken you from crayons to perfume?
It isn’t easy, but I’ll try
If you wanted the sky I would write
across the sky in letters that would soar a thousand feet high
To Sir, With Love

The time has come for closing books and
long last looks must end.
And as I leave I know that I am leaving
my best friend

A friend who taught me right from wrong and
weak from strong, that’s a lot to learn
What what can I give you in return?
If you wanted the moon I would try to make a start
But I would rather you let me give my heart
To sir with love

©1967, Screen Gem-EMI Music Inc.

Words and music by John Boydston
Here’s a story about a flamingo
Who wasn’t overjoyed
’Cause his first name was Sigmund
And his last name Floyd
In fact he was a little annoyed

Soon everyone knew about Pink Floyd
That’s what they called him in the tabloids
He got so famous they made him into toys
Lots of ’em, little pink plastic flamingos
People everywhere started putting them
In their front yards
(sounds pretty tacky to me, but what do I know?)

One day Pink Floyd moved to Salt Lake City
He got a wife, 2 kids, and a dog named Kitty
Then they moved back to F-L-A
Because they couldn’t stand the weather
They lived there happily together

Everybody loved Sigmund the Pink Flamingo
He went out every night playing Hi-Li and Bingo
One day he tried to change his name to Andon
He found out he didn’t have a leg to stand on
(that’s a little flamingo joke)

One Day Sigmund saw a friend in trouble
And when he did, he came on the double
His friend was a manatee you see
His first name was Hugh, that’s right, Hugh Manatee
And Pink Floyd had to save him

Hugh was stuck in the swamp, couldn’t move around
Sig was afraid his friend might drown
So he called his friends from way downtown
He said, “”Hey, help me save Hugh Manatee
(shouldn’t take too long)”"
They said, “”Well you know Sig,
we’re kind a busy now son”"
Pink said, “”5 minutes… That’s all we need.”"
They said, “”OK, if it means saving Hugh Manatee.”"

So they pushed and pulled
Trying to save Hugh Manatee
And finally Hugh was able to swim free
He said, “”Thanks, Pink. The next one’s on me.
Thanks for saving Hugh Manatee.”"
Pink said, “” No, thank You, you are the Man-a-tee.”"
Hugh said, “” No, I insist. Thank You Pink Floyd.
You saved Hugh Manatee.”"
Everybody sang,
“”Thank you for saving Hugh Manatee”"
Everybody sang,
“”Thank you for saving Hugh Manatee”"
Everybody sang,
“”Thank you for saving Hugh Manatee”"

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by John Boydston

Well Well Well
Some dads they rock and some dads roll
That’s just the way they are
They like to boogie, and woogie
On their 6-String orchestras

You can hear ’em in the basement
With their weekend band
Sounds like the Replacements
But it’s a one-night stand

I got a dad and he rocks
Maybe you do too
He doesn’t wear white socks
When he wears his black shoes

But he’ll dress like a cowboy
When he’s playing his guitar
He’s got his 10-gallon hat on
When he’s singing to the stars
And I got a mom who boogies
She used to do the Bossa Nova
That’s how she met my dad
Way back in Oklahoma
She used to wear her hair
In a big beehive do
Just like those ladies
In the B-52’s

Some people like the rocking
Others they like the rolling
And it doesn’t matter at all
Even if they like bowling
But you’ll never see my dad
On the boulevard
He’s way too busy mowing our back yard

You got a dad who doesn’t rock?
You gotta give him the news
Tell him he can’t wear black socks
With shorts and tennis shoes

He’ll be a dad who rocks
And you’ll know he’s not dumb
When goes out and gets himself
A brand new set of drums
(and it’ll sound like this I betcha)

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes

Words and music by Michael McKean, Christopher Guest, Rob Reiner

Listen to what the flower people say
Listen, it’s getting louder every day

Listen, it’s like a bolt out of the blue
Listen, it could be calling now for you

Flower people walk on by
Flower people don’t you cry, it’s not too late
It’s not too late

Listen, it’s like a Mozart symphony
Listen, it’s something just for you and me

Listen, to what the flower people say
Listen, it’s getting truer every day

Flimtrax Copyright Hldgs Inc. OBO EMI Brillig Music Inc

Instrumental

Words and Music by John Boydston

I’m a guy who can’t make any rhymes
I’m a guy who can’t make any rhymes
If I’ve tried once
I’ve tried a thousand different “”occasions”"

No matter what I do, I can’t rhyme two simple words
No matter what I do, I can’t rhyme two simple words
I think the rhyming thing stuff
might be for the… “”little things with feathers that fly”"

I’m looking for a rhyme, I’m looking low and high
I’m looking for a rhyme, I’m looking low and high
If I still can’t make a rhyme
I think I should say “”Good-Riddance”"

Everytime I try and put two easy words together
Everytime I try and put two easy words together
I end up talking about the confounded…
“”various atmostpheric conditions outside”"

So I asked my mom,
I said, “”why why why why why?”"
I asked my mother why why why why?
She just turned to me and then
she started to “”weep, uncontrollably”"

Then one day I was walking down the road
I met a pink flamingo
I was walking down the road I met a pink flamingo
I asked her, I said who’s your favorite Beatle,
and she said, “”George”"

(many false endings and questional puns later, this song ends)

©2005, (BMI) Boyd’s Tone Tunes